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    【求好心的老师可以细批一下我的雅思作文100分送上作文是剑桥五text

    The first chart illustrates what is the main reason for study among different age students. The second chart indicates how much support (is) received from employers in different age group. As can be seen, the percentage of those who study for career saw (sees) a fall with the age grown (grows). But ,while the percentage of (whose 改为 those) who study for interest is increasing and the proportion of employers support(s) hits a bottom in the age group (of) 30-39.(For those) Under 26, (the) proportion of those who study for career(s) (stand 改为 is standing) at 80% that (study) for interest (is) only at 10%. However , with the age grown (grows) that (study) for career decreases to just over 20% in (the) group of over 49 that (study) for interest rises to 70%.The proportion of employer support reaches at over 60% in the group of under 26, and experiences a downward trend ,bottom(s) at (just) over 30% in (the) group of 30-39, before rising (again), which grows to over 40% in (the) group of over 49.其实你写得非常之好,文体结构和语法运用正确,无须更改,只是有一些错漏,为了方便你可以知道错在那里,我用括号把修改了的括著.另外你问楼上为甚麽with the age grows 而不是with the age growing,这个你只要看你自己写的最后一句 which grows to over 40% in the group of over 49. 便应该知道是同一原因.还有一样要提醒你的是: that 和 which 的准确标点符号法.that 之前是不用逗号的,但which之前则一定要用逗号,这是一个重要的英语文法.请切记!。

    雅思小作文求批改+评论 内容:剑桥8 test 2

    第一段changes -----varies

    第二段spending---expenditure on this leaped by 10%, reaching the proportion of 50%

    第四段There was a downward trend. It decreased from 28% in 1981 to 22% in 1991. Consequently, it descended to only 5% in 2001.最好连成一句吧 There was a downward trend, which subsided from 28% in 1981 to 22% in 1991, and consequently descended to merely 5% 10 years later

    第五段experienced up and down---fluctuated,spending---expense

    结尾 时态不大对。按你原来的可以改成 In a word, the most principal segment turned out to be the salaries of teachers, occupying approximately half of the overall expenditure. The fluctuation of spending on other issues, such as insurance and resources, could be witnessed as well.

    请帮我批改一下这篇雅思作文(剑9test3小作文)

    The four pie charts reveal information on the ages of the populations in 2000 and projections for 2050 in two countries, namely Yemen and Italy.

    In Yemen, the populations under 14 years old was the biggest part (50%) in2000, but it will be a sharply decrease reach 37% in 2050. On the contrary, the time from 2000 to 2050 witnessed a dramatically rise by 11% of the populations between 15 to 59 years old. Similarly, there is a smoothly increase of the population above 60 years old around 2%.

    The second two charts of Italy shows the proportion of population under 14 years old is decline slightly to 11.5%. In addition, the ratio of populations which between 15 and 59 years old presents a hugely slump by 15% from 2000 to 2050. However, the rate of population above 60 years old compared with that in 2050, it is doubled.

    Overall, people above 60 years old are the main populations in 2050 of Yemen. Although, in Italy the population between 15 to 59 years old occupies 46.2% in 2050,but the percentage of old people is 42.3% and more higher than that in Yemen.

    改了一些错误拼写和语法

    雅思作文开头模板

    第一句,总结某某现象,是不是变得更有争议了,或者某某东西是不是变得更加重要了。

    (我感觉是一句废话)第二句,就是你说的,某某认为怎样,然而某某又认为不然。第三句,personally,或者As for me(很多,多记几个),表达自己观点。

    当然 这是写5段式的模板,如果要两边讨论的话,就先不忙表达自己观点,最后一段再表达,第3句就写:我将从两方面讨论。我就是这样总结的。

    然后剑家族的每一个text后面的范文,看看samples是怎么开头的。多看几篇,大概结构就能出来了。

    其实很多参考书里都总结得有。我就大概说下:(根据我的记忆)5段式:第1段引出论题, 第2段列出观点一, 第3段列出观点二, 第4段列出观点3。

    第5段总结。 这是一边倒的。

    或者:第一段引出 第二段观点1 第三段观点2 第四段让步段 第五段总结。还有四段式,一般是两边都讨论。

    还是那句话,多研究范文,特别是剑桥上的。自己分析下结构,积累一点连接词。

    雅思小作文求批改+评论 内容:剑桥8 test 2

    第一段changes -----varies第二段spending---expenditure on this leaped by 10%, reaching the proportion of 50%第四段There was a downward trend. It decreased from 28% in 1981 to 22% in 1991. Consequently, it descended to only 5% in 2001.最好连成一句吧 There was a downward trend, which subsided from 28% in 1981 to 22% in 1991, and consequently descended to merely 5% 10 years later第五段experienced up and down---fluctuated,spending---expense结尾 时态不大对。

    按你原来的可以改成 In a word, the most principal segment turned out to be the salaries of teachers, occupying approximately half of the overall expenditure. The fluctuation of spending on other issues, such as insurance and resources, could be witnessed as well。.。

    这个是剑桥7 test4 的小作文,请大家帮忙改一下,谢谢啦!!

    The given pie charts illustrate unites of electricity production by fuel score (coal, oil, natural gas, hydro power and nuclear power) in Australia and France in 1980 and 2000.这里没能完全描述出图表的主要特征。

    且首段过于简单,记住首段是面子,一定要写的漂亮。As can be seen from these charts, the units of electricity by different categories of fuel were various in two countries in the different years. Specifically, in 1980, approximately half of the electricity units were produced by coal ,which shared the same production with natural gas (only 25 units) in France. The electricity units/delete production by natural gas were 20 units in Australia. In terms of//用词不准确,和后面的半句意义一样,整句就是重复累赘,production by oil and hydro power , the units of electricity produced by hydro power were 20 units, which were four times /加greater/ than those in France, however, only 10 units of electricity were made/generated by oil in Australia, which were half of those in France. To our surprise , nuclear power made 15 units of electricity in France and none of any/the others contributed /as much to the electricity/power supply in France.In 2002, the majority of//不能这样用 electricity was produce/d by coal ( 130 units) in Australia, which still made the same quantity /units/删掉 (25 units) in France. Clearly, the dominant production of electricity was by nuclear power in France with the amount of 126 units. Natural gas and oil produced very little//口语化,书面语少用very// electricity (only 2 units) in Australia. The France had the/a similar quantity by natural gas and hydro power.Overall, these figures lead us to /the/ conclusion that coal is the major source to produce electricity in Australia while nuclear power played a significant role in production of electricity in France.我一直不知道小作文要怎么才能进步,每次都会超时,用大概25分钟才能写完,而且字数都超很多(超过200)。

    请各位指导一下我,该怎么在不到一个月的时间内提高小作文。如何避免在把信息点都描述清楚后字数不会超。

    万分感谢!!估计你小作文超时的原因有二,第一,不是很熟悉图表作文的套话,或者说写作模板准备不够,第二,对小作文的要求理解不到位,当然也有可能是你对如何抓住图表的main features的技巧掌握的还不娴熟。这也就导致你时间花的过多,且写出来的东西就像我们的伟大祖国一样,大而漏洞百出问题多多。

    小作文就是要求短小精悍,150词能解决就不需要200或更多。多了反而更容易出错,所谓言多必失。

    针对这样的问题,你可以首先多看些小作文的范文,掌握一些通用的结构和规律,在练习中提炼你自己的常用句型和模板,考试时能做到提笔就写拿来就用。再就是小作文要求得很清楚,抓住图表的主要特征进行描述就好,无需太过在意次要细节。

    每个图表或者数据都是在讲一个问题,你要看出这个问题就好了,不需要面面俱到的。这篇文章你去对照一下后面的范文就知道其实要拿高分,完全不需要描述所有的信息点。

    这个文章抓住电力增长很快,同时澳洲主要靠煤,法国主要靠核能这两个点就好了。如果你不确定是不是看图分析能力还不够的话,你可以先用中文写写小作文,或者把自己的小作文翻译成中文,然后给你的父母同学朋友看看,让他们评价一下你的文章在抛开语言的前提下是否完成了描述图表主要特征的任务。

    如果没有,那你首先要考虑提高看图能力。相信在你理解了小作文的得分点和技巧后,会很快上手的。

    还是那句话,雅思一点都不可怕,加油。

    求雅思2篇大作文的思路

    你好,今天为备考中的考生们准备了2012年10月11日的雅思写作考试大作文解析,内容非常实用,供考生们参考。

    这次的大作文是关于个人幸福感的,如果你在考试时遇到了此类的话题不知道怎样表达时,就可以参考以下写作思路。 2012年10月11日大作文题目: Some people think personal happiness is directly related to economic success, while others believe this depends on other factors. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. 雅思题目的范围非常广,其中的题目难易程度梯度相差比较大。

    不过题目的难易程度也是一个相对的概念。考生只要对于一些题目的素材有些积累,就能比较从容的应付相关的题目。

    此题就是一个例子。 如果一方的观点过于绝对,出现类似“every”“all”“the only”,等关键字,建议考生在最后个段落中不同意此方观点。

    此题一方观点中“directly”过于绝对。但即便如此,考生需要用一个段落阐述快乐部分取决于经济上的成就。

    可供参考的素材: 既然说是可供参考,就说明只是一家之言。呵呵。

    期望的高分的同学务必重视“切题”“论述的连贯一直”。另外,对比的句子在雅思考官满分范文中出现的频率非常高,下面的英文刻意多用了些类似的表达。

    这里给出的英文主要供期望写作7+的同学参考。期望5.5-6分的同学大体上做到不跑题太远,语法错误不能太明显,甚至多用点模板都可以。

    第二段: (论述为什么经济上的成功在一些程度上是人快乐。) 人们对生活的满意程度部分取决于一个人的经济上的成就。

    我们生活在一个世界里,身在其中的绝大部分人将一个人的赚钱能力同一个人的社会地位相等同。当一个人必须经常考虑如何能找到体面的工作来缓解家庭经济压力时,他无法真正享受生活。

    当一个人能在一天赚的钱比他人一个月转得更多时,他更有可能获得别人的尊重,这种尊重is widely thought to be closely related to one's sense of fulfillment. People's contentment with life is partly determined by their economic achievement, which could be explained by the fact that we are living in a world where most people associate one's ability to make money with one' social status. An individual, constantly having to consider how to relieve his family of economic burden, is deprived of the chance to enjoy life. And a worker capable of earning within a month what others cannot earn within a year is more likely to gain respect from others,and this sense of being esteemed is widely thought to be related to one's sense of fulfillment. 第三段:(论述其他因素同样影响一个人对生活的满意度。这些因素包括:一个人是否有归属感, 工作中的成就感,认同感。)

    人们对于生活的看法受经济生成就的影响不尽然意味着他是唯一的因素。一个人的归属人感同样重要。

    人们都生活在一个社交网中,这个社交网使得人意识到被他人认同,使得他们意识到自己属于哪一个群体。一个抽不出足够时间同家人朋友在一起的人不能被称作是幸福的人,即使它赚取了足够的钱。

    此外,当人意识到自己所做的工作能给他带来价值,这种快乐同样无法用金钱衡量。 However, economic success is not necessarily the only criterion for measuring how people feel about life. Their sense of identity is also a decisive factor for their happiness. We are living in a social net, which allows us to be approved by others and to have a knowledge of which community we belong to. An individual unable to set aside enough time for family union would fail to feel satisfied, despite the great wealth he could create. Besides, recognition that what one is doing could contribute to others also brings happiness, which could not be acquired by coins. 以上就是关于2012年10月11日雅思写作大作文的解析,还是比较有参加价值的,建议广大考生在备考阶段也要多注意这类的雅思写作大作文话题。

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